Monday, July 25, 2005

Rapid Fire


Dir: Dwight H. Little (Free Willie 2: the Adventure Home; Murder at 1600; Anacondas: The Hunt for the Blood Orchid)

Brandon Lee, son of Bruce, witnesses a slaying and must fight back to regain his life and freedom.

It was bad movie night in the Silva household. After the show, I do an internet hit on the movie to learn about the director and see that some folks actually like it. Actually like Brandon Lee! Listen to me, now. Brandon Lee is to Bruce Lee like Colin Hanks is to Tom Hanks. Like Liza Minelli is to Judy Garland.

The fight scenes have pauses after every move, like the actors are counting their beats. "One, arm up, two leg out, three cheesy sound effect . . ." Lots of glass gets broken, and thankfully a hair metal band was available to lay down the soundtrack. The eye candy women in the movie are singularly unattractive, even.

Highlights include: Brandon Lee without his shirt on. Brandon Lee leaning against a tree and remembering his dad who died during Tianamen Square (he is troubled, that Brandon). Brandon Lee beating up a guy in a mullet with a stick (my personal favorite part of the movie). And Brandon Lee without his shirt on. In fact, 85% of this movie features Brandon's pecks or armpits. Not that he has any pecks, mind you. But he needs freedom of motion or something when beating up Italian Americans.

I have never seen The Crow. But if this is the same guy, buy me a bottle of wine and sign me up.



Blogger ronvon2 noted on 7/26/2005 06:41:00 PM that...

I will say, I did like "the Crow" and Lee was not to bad in it. But, I think the success of "the Crow" has a lot more to do with director Alex Proyas (Dark City, I, Robot) and Mr. Lee.  

Blogger paroske noted on 7/28/2005 12:04:00 AM that...

But did Brandon Lee take his shirt off for The Crow? Because, man, Brandon can't be confined by the Man's shirts, you dig? He's an eagle, soaring above the earth, and his pearls of sweat can't be absorbed by cotton or wool; his essence has to rain down like a mighty river.